SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: June 28, 2020 Edition

Read more on this subject: Humor
Opinion Column by John Semmens
Poll: Voters Turning to Dems for Protection

A new Rasmussen poll shows a plurality of voters (49%) are ready to elect former Vice-President Joe Biden "to scale back the violence that is tearing our cities apart."

A poll respondent from New York City explained that "paying for protection is the best option we have. Sure, it's extortion, but what choice do we have? The reality is that it is better to pay off those controlling the mobs who stand ready to destroy everything a bigger slice of our hard-earned money than to see them wreck everything like they have been doing the past month."

A respondent from Minneapolis gave a similar answer, saying "with the police being abolished we have nowhere to turn for protection against these thugs. It is better to live as serfs under the thumb of criminals than to be killed by them. If we vote Biden in we're hoping that as head 'capo' he can rein-in the destruction by establishing a reasonable wealth
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