SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: June 30, 2019 Edition

Read more on this subject: Humor
Opinion Column by John Semmens
Dems Promise Free Health Care for All

As candidate after candidate insisted that health care is a human right, the entire field of 2020 Democratic presidential contenders found themselves unable to exclude any human being from the enjoyment of this universal right. In a show of hands at a debate every candidate agreed that illegal immigrants would be included in their health plans should he or she succeed in getting elected in November 2020.

Sen. Elizabeth Warren (Mass) explained that "human rights aren't only for American citizens. They are for everyone. Withholding these benefits from anyone would be immoral. To use a man-made demarcation line like a country's border to deny this right to those born on the other side is just plain selfish. We're the richest nation in the world. It's about time we started sharing our good fortune with those poorer than ourselves."

Sen. Bernie Sanders (Vermont) contended that "I am the only one who has been hones
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